On Seeking Love and Acceptance

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In the midst of finishing up on one of the biggest dreams of our lives, the completion of our custom solar home in rural southern Colorado, my family has decided to reject us.

To me this is simply the icing on the cake of decades of constant criticism and disrespect. Apparently we do not live up their idea of decent human beings, although neither one of us have any idea why.

This is so difficult to deal with in the midst of pure joy. Their lack of support has been a negative distraction from the real challenges of building a home from the footers up. The whole time I have been working to adjust to life in a new part of the state, I have had their criticisms in the back of my mind.

I am now through with that past:

“The secret of change is to focus all of your energy, not on fighting the old, but on building the new.”  — Socrates

After 60 years of trying to please them, I have finally given up.

I found a phrase yesterday that I should have been living by for the past 50 years. Listen carefully and live accordingly:

IF SOMEONE DOES NOT APPRECIATE YOUR EFFORTS, STOP TRYING TO PLEASE THEM.  IF THEY DON’T APPRECIATE YOU, THEY DON’T DESERVE YOU.

Laura Lee Carter, MA Counseling Psychology, the writer behind the popular online blog How to Believe in Love Again, has been helping others turn midlife difficulties into opportunities for personal change since 2007. Besides working as a psychotherapist, Laura Lee has authored a number of books and e-books on midlife transformation.  Don’t miss her new book: Find Your Reason to Be Here: The Search for Meaning in Midlife. Follow her on Twitter: @midlifequeen.