How to Face Life’s Challenges When You Are Thrown a Curveball

By Susan “Honey” Good

I am interested in everything. You name it, I’m curious. Even a new word can strike my fancy. While on the Island of Bali, a few weeks ago with my ultimate concierge, I learned the word antifragility, not easily broken or damaged.

A woman who has an antifragile mindset is not easily broken. She knows how to face life’s challenges and straighten out the curve in the ball. When times are tough, she picks up her pieces and moves forward. This is because she is strong.

LIFE’S CURVEBALLS

Sooner or later life throws us a curve; several curves to be exact. When I think back on my life, I have had more than my share of difficult times. Not moments, times. I had sad times, disappointing times, frightening times and long stretches of times when my life would have seemed unfair to most. On my word of honor, I have never felt sorry for myself for more than a short time. Why? Because I have always been a positive female and felt whatever I was thrown, I could —  and would — survive.

After I calm myself, I search with 100% positivity for ‘the light at the end of the tunnel.’ This is an important reason that I can be a resilient and anti-fragile woman. Darlings, that is my model for survival, and it has worked.

YOU MIX A POSITIVE ATTITUDE WITH A RESILIENT MIND-SET, AND AN ANTI FRAGILE DETERMINATION AND YOU WILL LAND SUCCESSFULLY ON YOUR FEET.

You can train your mind to confront your woes positively. I know this because I taught myself. No, I did not read ‘how to’ psychology books. Rather, I learned through my life experiences how to shift from “poor me” to “I am just fine, thank you.” And, that my darlings is one of the crucial keys to living a stress-free and healthy lifestyle.

Resilience is to be able to recover from a blow or a hardship. Anti-fragility has the emotional make-up to get stronger after you have been harmed.

We have all been placed in fragile positions during our lives. Sometimes it has been our fault. Sometimes it has been the luck of the draw, and sometimes it has been caused by unhealthy relationships. Whatever the reasons, at these times it is essential to connect with your positive thoughts. A positive outlook provides you with the ability to face your challenges.

Most women over 50 are resilient. I am not sure how many of you are anti-fragile. But you can be; here are a few techniques you can practice.

CULTIVATE RESILIENCE; YOU CAN RECOVER

1. Stay focused on your objective without giving in to discouragement.
2. Concentrate on only what you can control.
3. Control your negative emotions.
4. Live in the here and now.
5. Stay true to your convictions.

CULTIVATE ANTI-FRAGILITY

A woman who understands anti-fragility is open to uncertainty, self-discovery, and adventure. She handles traumatic experiences and their possibilities. This makes her life worthwhile.

1. Please remember that another word for life is imperfection. There is no perfection in our lives, darlings.
2. Remember, life holds many positive possibilities.
3. Create excess: You do not want to be left in a fragile state. Have a primary and secondary for that which is important to you. This goes for friendships, hobbies, personal interests, work. In other words, “Don’t put all of your eggs in one basket.” If one basket of eggs falls by the wayside, you have another, full basket.
4. Rid yourself of things that make you fragile. Pay off your debts. Delete toxic people in your life. Get out of obligations that do not make your heart sing.
5. Get control my, darlings; You have the power to influence your behavior.

Never, and I do mean never, put all your eggs in one basket. Having more than one basket filled has saved me more than a few times.

Susan “Honey” Good is the founder of HoneyGood.com where this blog originally appeared. The site is a collection of lessons learned, life advice and insights from not only her, but from a fantastic group of contributing writers, each adding their own spice to the recipe. Honey Good.com representing “a family tree of women” — wives, mothers, daughters, granddaughters, mothers-in-law, daughters-in-law, sisters, aunts, cousins and girlfriends — coming together to talk about what makes them tick as well as what they have in common. Honey Good discusses life experiences with wisdom, humor and intellect, enabling all to attain a “Honey Good Style of Life.”