Hospitality

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I recently read an article on southern hospitality; it said that everyone visiting the region, whether a stranger or returning guest, will be treated in a warm, friendly, generous way. This got me thinking about what hospitality means to me.

I have lived my nearly 55 years in Queens, New York. I live 15 minutes away from the six-family apartment building I was raised in. Back then everyone knew each other by name, and we treated each other like family. Children had to show respect to their elders. They called them Mr. or Mrs.  If they were good friends to us, they called our parents Aunt and Uncle. 

I believe hospitality is a way of life that can be found in all places, because we certainly had it back then.

The lessons mentioned in the article were the same things I learned in childhood. They are simple things that I have lived my life trying to do: Be polite, say hello to people you meet, offer to help others as often as you can, smile, pay many compliments,  say please and thank you, always be nicer than necessary and have respect.  My mother raised us with the knowledge that people are much more important than things.  Be caring and kind.  Always respect your elders and most importantly your parents.

These days we choose texts and emails versus picking up our phone and verbally communicating.  Back in the day we had one telephone in the house, and while I know we need modern technology I have learned to shut my screens down a bit more and verbally communicate, visit with people and try to be more generous with my time.  Hospitality is about doing what is important.

I have had grits in Atlanta and farina here at home. They have different names but are the same dish that tastes delicious in both places. “How y’all doing?”” does have a sweeter sound than “How are ya?”. But the meaning is the same. Maybe parks no longer have bands playing on Sunday summer afternoons but we can crank up the music in our homes and sing out loud.  Maybe things are bigger in Texas. and perhaps I don’t have the great southern barbeque that was described in the article. But I have made pretty darn good chicken, ribs and chili right here in my Queens kitchen.

This Big Apple girl who will forever call New York home thanks you so much for visiting her today and hopes Y’all come back real soon for another ! I promise you’ll love it, because a day without hospitality is a wasted day.

Donna Ryan is the editor of the blog 50plusstickingtogether.com. To read more of Donna's work, click here.