In Praise of a (Mostly) Undocumented Christmas

By Sondra Forsyth

From the vantage point of the second week of January 2014, I’m reflecting on how very much I enjoyed the Christmas of 2013 once I let go of my self-appointed role as the family videographer. The year my first grandchild was born, 2008, I bought a Flip camera and a lightweight tripod and spent my entire holiday visit capturing every possible moment for posterity. When I wasn’t staring at the little screen and exhorting everyone to smile or say something worth recording, I was busy downloading the scenes to my laptop. Once I got back home, I learned to create awesome little montages using only the best parts. I made sure to excise whatever was less than festive, including the times when my three-month-old grandson was crying and any group shots in which I didn’t think I looked my best. To my credit, I refrained from posting these amateur cinematic efforts on Facebook and YouTube, but I sent DVDs to my daughter and kept DVDs for myself.

I envisioned a growing archive of family documentaries that would chronicle the growth of my grandchild from year to year. My Flip camera and tripod went with me again in 2009, and by 2010 I had a second grandson so my feeling that I needed to keep up the tradition of preserving our holidays grew even more pressing. By 2011 and 2012, the boys would instantly smile and say “Hi, Nana!” when I pointed my camera at them. “You’ve sure got them trained,” my daughter remarked in the dry humor tone of voice she does so well. Yet I flinched for only a split second before I resolutely resumed my mission.

Then in 2013, as I was packing for my flight from New York to Phoenix for Christmas, I held the Flip camera in my hand and had an inexplicable urge to leave it behind. A feeling washed over me that I wanted to be fully present during the days I was about to spend with my family rather than trying to record it all. I did bring the camera but when my daughter picked me up at the airport, I asked her if she would mind if I didn’t play the role of filmmaker. She grinned broadly as if to say, “What took you so long?”

And thus it was that I spent hours and hours soaking in the entirely unabridged reality of relating to those I love so deeply. My daughter did take a few still photographs but for the most part my 2013 visit lives on only in the movie of my mind. My holiday memories of two beloved little boys and my daughter and son-in-law are rich with both the fun and the foibles of the magic years when children can teach us to see life once again through new and hopeful eyes. That is a treasure vastly more vivid and precious than any staged and edited montage I could have added to the collection on my shelf.

Sondra Forsyth is Co-Editor-in-Chief of ThirdAge.com. She is a National Magazine Award winner with scores of major magazine bylines and twelve books to her credit. Her most recent book is “Candida Cleanse: The 21-Day Diet to Beat Yeast and Feel Your Best”. Sondra was Executive Editor at "Ladies’ Home Journal," Features Editor at "Cosmopolitan," and Articles Editor at "Bride’s." A former ballerina, she founded Ballet Ambassadors, an arts-in-education company in New York City, and served as Artistic Director for 16 years.